13 May, 2008
3701 SW 12th St., Topeka, KS
Although I am on vacation at present, I still read the newspaper and have seen you carrying signs stating that I hate fags. First of all, that book you’re getting all this from is an unauthorized biography, the authors of which, believe you me, would be in for a good, old-fashioned suing if they weren’t dead. Secondly, some of my best friends are fags, (Shiva, for instance). And lastly, while I am on vacation, my lawyers are not; so if you keep up these libelous actions I will sue your ass.
Oh So Sincerely Wishing You Were Here,